This week has been an exercise in frustration, in regards to taking care of the puppy.
It does not help that my beloved is out of town on business. For this, I cannot blame her, as it was an opportunity to go to the city of New York, which I hear is a good deal more exciting than La Crosse, Wisconsin.
When mommy is not on a business trip, she can stay at home with the puppy, and the puppy is relatively well-behaved. When mommy is off on a business trip, the puppy misses mommy. The puppy misses mommy very much. Daddy has to spend his days at work, because his job is not quite so cushy. So puppy gets anxious and may decide to chew on things that are not designed for it. So scratch one tablecloth, and one paperback book.
Some weeks ago puppy had her floppy rear dewclaws surgically removed. We were instructed to keep her wounds bandaged and not let her run around a lot. As far as I know, the only ways to keep a puppy from running around a lot and getting hyper are chemical sedatives, physical restraints, severe injury, and death. None of these were attractive options. And it did not help that the weather decided to turn rainy and foul. So we didn't want to let her outside. Which was great except for the whole elimination of waste thing. So the carpet suffered under the stress, and we nearly had to housetrain her a second time.
And then puppy had a good day at the dog park. She probably injured one of her hind legs in all the enthusiastic running. The veterinarian suspects soft tissue damage; this is corroborated by her willingness and ability to walk with a limp, a limp which does not seem to diminish with time and pain medication. (Fortunately, the pills taste okay; it's nothing like trying to give a pill to a cat.)
So puppy gets all hyper when I return from what must be (to her) an excruciatingly long day at work. I want to work her energy off, but I can't coax her to play outside, which she shouldn't do anyway, lest she exacerbate her injury. I try to take her for an easy, slow walk around the block -- also questionable judgment on my part but it was probably good for puppy emotionally -- and as I get back, she scares one of the cats into the back yard. She-kitty, who is a dark tortie, hides in the darkest corner of the yard while I look all around the house, trying to figure out why she didn't come when I opened the can of cat food. (As many of us know, this is one of the few sounds to which a cat will pay attention.) So after some frantic searching inside and outside the house, I retrieve she-kitty and carry her back into the house, past puppy. Only problem is she-kitty hates puppy with a vengeance, from any distance. I was lucky I didn't take claw damage.
Perhaps the only thing that went right was that puppy is now relaxing in her crate after some barking outside.
I have this feeling that even without the added wrinkles of two cats and my beloved on a business trip, my resolve would still be tested by a puppy. I don't like questioning my resolve. I have always been able to answer "Can I do this?" with "yes." It may take me a while to get motivated, but once I decide that I can, it gets done. Puppy thrusts me into unfamiliar territory; when I have to deal with her, it always seems to be a chore. Puppy makes me question my resolve. I look at puppy, I ask "Can I raise her?" and the answer which comes back is filled with fear, uncertainty, and doubt.
Losing weight was easy compared to this. For puppy's sake, and for mine, I hope my doubts clear soon.
