title: This Isn't Funny Anymore
category: pets
content: |

    <p>Whoever dictates the dog's lot in life has a sick sense of
    humor.  (Please do not insert obligatory Depeche Mode lyric
    here.)</p>

    <p>So in this house of which my beloved and I own approximately
    one percent, we have a couple areas of floor which are quite
    slippery, if you are an exuberant puppy who likes to run
    everywhere.  The entry hall is this imitation wood substance
    which is suspect is basically plastic.  The kitchen and dining
    room are linoleum.  Attempting to stop or turn at full speed
    on these surfaces generally fails, or is met with sliding, and
    puppy paws all over the place.  This could put Sarah's legs at
    odd angles, possibly leading to future leg injuries.</p>

    <p>The future is now!</p>

    <p>Last night we wanted to walk Sarah to her puppy class, but
    she was limping noticeably in one of her hind legs.  She wasn't
    yelping in pain; she was instead ignoring her limp and continuing
    on her walk.  She has yelped in pain after taking certain steps
    in certain places outside.  Apparently most of these places are
    on grass, because now she won't go outside on to the grass to
    eliminate.  This was demonstrated this morning when I heard my
    beloved yelp at Sarah in the carpeted living room.  This was
    followed by dragging the poor puppy outside to use the correct
    toilet.</p>

    <p>We did buy some pain medication for Sarah, and hopefully
    this will help on a temporary basis.  She will go to the vet
    soon.  We do not want a dog who associates our back lawn with
    pain, and chooses to urinate on the carpet because of it.</p>

    <p>As for You, whoever You are, please stop gambling with our
    dog.  It has caused me no shortage of grief and stress.  Instead
    of costing us extra time and money, how about teaching Sarah
    how to deal with slippery surfaces?  Oh, wait.  You don't want
    us to succeed.</p>