title: Meme Misappropriation: It's Not My Birthday
category: memes
content: |
Misappropriated from bitterspice. Data
thieved from Wikipedia,
final arbiter of absolutely nothing on t3h intarw33bz.
So take it with some amount of salt. Warning: may contain
italicized snark.
Five Events:
- 1492 - Ferdinand and Isabella sign the Alhambra decree aimed at expelling all Jews from Spain unless they convert to Roman Catholicism. Perhaps this is how my mother's grandparents ended up as sub-citizens in Turkey.
- 1858 - Hymen Lipman patents a pencil with an attached eraser. Has an intellectual property lawyer jumped on this one yet?
- 1870 - Texas is readmitted to the Union following Reconstruction. Would I have met my betrothed otherwise?
- 1951 - Remington Rand delivers the first UNIVAC I computer to the United States Census Bureau. Thus ensuring that The Register would always be able to find Comedy Gold when governments use computers.
- 2006 - Marcos Pontes is the first Brazilian astronaut in space. I think you mispronounced IN SPAAAAACE.
Five Births:
- 1135 - Maimonides, Spanish rabbi and philosopher (d. 1204) Back when it was almost cool to be smart and Jewish.
- 1914 - Sonny Boy Williamson I, American musician (d. 1948). Blues harp, yo.
- 1950 - Robbie Coltrane, Scottish actor and comedian. Och!
- 1967 - Megumi Hayashibara, Japanese voice actress and singer. Is my inner child really a 15-year-old Japanese schoolgirl?
- 1968 - Céline Dion, Canadian singer. When Canada is dead and gone / there'll be no more...
Five Deaths, snark-free:
- 1840 - Beau Brummell, English celebrity and dandy (b. 1778).
- 1966 - Maxfield Parrish, American artist (b. 1870)
- 1977 - Abdel Halim Hafez, Egyptian singer and actor (b. 1929).
- 1986 - James Cagney, American actor (b. 1899)
- 2002 - Elizabeth Bowes-Lyon, Queen Mother of the United Kingdom (b. 1900)